An honest question
Is it ever okay to lie? What about lying to avoid shame?
Key points
- Short answer: Christians are called to be honest, because God is truth and lies break trust between people.
- What Jesus did: Jesus said, “You will know the truth, and the truth will make you free.”
- The Lutheran view: In the Small Catechism, Luther explains the commandment against lying as more than not lying.
The short answer
Christians are called to be honest, because God is truth and lies break trust between people.
Most lies are told out of fear: of shame, of trouble, of being found out. Jesus deals with that fear, not just the lie.
What Jesus said and did
Jesus said, “You will know the truth, and the truth will make you free.” He told his followers to let their yes mean yes and their no mean no.
On the night Jesus was arrested, Peter, his closest friend, lied three times to save himself: “I don’t know the man.” Then Jesus turned and looked at him, and Peter went out and wept. After Easter, Jesus didn’t shame him. He asked Peter three times, “Do you love me?”, one for each denial, and gave him work to do: “Feed my sheep.”
A little longer
We usually lie to protect ourselves: to look better, to avoid being in trouble, or to hide something we’re ashamed of. The lie works for a while, but it makes the shame heavier, because now there is something else to hide.
Telling the truth is easier when you know you will be forgiven. That is why Christians pair honesty with grace. You can tell the truth to God, and to people who love you. The worst thing about you is not the last word.
There are hard cases. The Bible praises midwives who lied to Pharaoh to save Hebrew babies, and Christians who hid Jewish families from the Nazis lied to protect them. Most Christians believe lying to protect an innocent life from someone who would harm it is different from lying to protect yourself.
Where Christians disagree
Christians disagree about the hard cases. Some, following Augustine, say lying is always wrong, even to save a life. Others say truthfulness is owed to people who seek the truth in good faith, not to someone trying to do harm. Almost all agree that ordinary lies to protect ourselves are not okay.
How Lutherans see it
In the Small Catechism, Luther explains the commandment against lying as more than not lying. Protect your neighbor’s good name. Speak up for them. Think the best of what they do. Lutherans also practice confession: saying the truth out loud and hearing, “You are forgiven.”
Where it is in the Bible
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John 8:31–32 The truth will make you free.
Read John 8:31–32
31 Jesus therefore said to those Jews who had believed him, “If you remain in my word, then you are truly my disciples. 32 You will know the truth, and the truth will make you free.”
World English Bible, public domain. The whole chapter on Free Scripture → · Read in the NRSVue, the ELCA’s standard translation →
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Luke 22:54–62 Peter lies three times, and Jesus looks at him.
Read Luke 22:54–62
54 They seized him, and led him away, and brought him into the high priest’s house. But Peter followed from a distance. 55 When they had kindled a fire in the middle of the courtyard, and had sat down together, Peter sat among them. 56 A certain servant girl saw him as he sat in the light, and looking intently at him, said, “This man also was with him.” 57 He denied Jesus, saying, “Woman, I don’t know him.” 58 After a little while someone else saw him, and said, “You also are one of them!” But Peter answered, “Man, I am not!” 59 After about one hour passed, another confidently affirmed, saying, “Truly this man also was with him, for he is a Galilean!” 60 But Peter said, “Man, I don’t know what you are talking about!” Immediately, while he was still speaking, a rooster crowed. 61 The Lord turned and looked at Peter. Then Peter remembered the Lord’s word, how he said to him, “Before the rooster crows you will deny me three times.” 62 He went out, and wept bitterly.
World English Bible, public domain. The whole chapter on Free Scripture → · Read in the NRSVue, the ELCA’s standard translation →
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John 21:15–19 Three times, “Do you love me?” Peter is restored.
Read John 21:15–19
15 So when they had eaten their breakfast, Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you love me more than these?” He said to him, “Yes, Lord; you know that I have affection for you.” He said to him, “Feed my lambs.” 16 He said to him again a second time, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you love me?” He said to him, “Yes, Lord; you know that I have affection for you.” He said to him, “Tend my sheep.” 17 He said to him the third time, “Simon, son of Jonah, do you have affection for me?” Peter was grieved because he asked him the third time, “Do you have affection for me?” He said to him, “Lord, you know everything. You know that I have affection for you.” Jesus said to him, “Feed my sheep. 18 Most certainly I tell you, when you were young, you dressed yourself and walked where you wanted to. But when you are old, you will stretch out your hands, and another will dress you and carry you where you don’t want to go.” 19 Now he said this, signifying by what kind of death he would glorify God. When he had said this, he said to him, “Follow me.”
World English Bible, public domain. The whole chapter on Free Scripture → · Read in the NRSVue, the ELCA’s standard translation →
What do these words mean?
| The word | It means |
|---|---|
| Grace | God’s love that you don’t have to earn. |
| Faith | Trust in God. Lutherans say it is a gift God gives, not something you work up. |
| Catechism | A short book of the basics of the faith. Luther wrote one for families. |
| Confession | Telling God, and sometimes a pastor, what you have done wrong. |
Tap a word for more. All 228 church words: the glossary, A to Z
Where to go next
Other questions people ask
Written by Digital Lutheran Church, a small, free website from the nonprofit Hope for Americans, in the tradition of the ELCA. Bible passages are from the World English Bible.