What Jesus said about
Forgiveness and conflict
I don’t tell you until seven times, but, until seventy times seven.
Matthew 18:22
The short answer
Jesus expected his followers to hurt each other. He gave them a way to talk it through face to face, and told them to forgive without keeping count.
He also forgave the people who crucified him, while it was happening.
In the Gospels
-
Matthew 18:15–22
Go and talk to them
If someone wrongs you, go to them alone first. Then Peter asks how many times he has to forgive, and Jesus’ answer has no limit.
Read Matthew 18:15–22
15 “If your brother sins against you, go, show him his fault between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained back your brother. 16 But if he doesn’t listen, take one or two more with you, that at the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established. 17 If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the assembly. If he refuses to hear the assembly also, let him be to you as a Gentile or a tax collector. 18 Most certainly I tell you, whatever things you bind on earth will have been bound in heaven, and whatever things you release on earth will have been released in heaven. 19 Again, assuredly I tell you, that if two of you will agree on earth concerning anything that they will ask, it will be done for them by my Father who is in heaven. 20 For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there I am in the middle of them.” 21 Then Peter came and said to him, “Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Until seven times?” 22 Jesus said to him, “I don’t tell you until seven times, but, until seventy times seven.
World English Bible, public domain. The whole chapter on Free Scripture → · Read in the NRSVue, the ELCA’s standard translation →
-
Matthew 5:23–24
Before the offering
If you remember someone has something against you, go and make peace first, then come back and worship.
Read Matthew 5:23–24
23 “If therefore you are offering your gift at the altar, and there remember that your brother has anything against you, 24 leave your gift there before the altar, and go your way. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift.
World English Bible, public domain. The whole chapter on Free Scripture → · Read in the NRSVue, the ELCA’s standard translation →
-
Luke 23:33–34
“Father, forgive them”
On the cross, Jesus prays for the soldiers who are killing him.
Read Luke 23:33–34
33 When they came to the place that is called “The Skull”, they crucified him there with the criminals, one on the right and the other on the left. 34 Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they don’t know what they are doing.” Dividing his garments among them, they cast lots.
World English Bible, public domain. The whole chapter on Free Scripture → · Read in the NRSVue, the ELCA’s standard translation →
How Lutherans read this
Every Lutheran service begins or includes confession and forgiveness, because the church is made of forgiven people who still wrong each other. Forgiving someone does not mean pretending the harm didn’t happen, or staying somewhere unsafe.
A question to take with you
Is there a conversation Jesus’ first step would ask of you?
Hear a pastor on this
- Forgiveness
What forgiveness actually asks of you, and what it does not.
Further reading from the Lutheran tradition: 4 works in the library.